2005/02/14

Presidential Selection


"Wally promised me Ohio.
He can give you England"
.

In an effort to guarantee a Labor Party victory early next year, Tony Blair made an emergency trip to the United States asking President Bush to sell Great Britain the Diebold Corporation touch screen voting machines. Designed by Wally O'Dell, no relation to "Digger" (though there seems to be a similarity) these voting machines are absent of a paper trail, and proved to be more efficient than the Supreme Court in presidential selection. The president agreed to the sale, pending approval by Vice President Dick Cheney.

In many instances, particularly in Ohio, these magic machines were able to count more voters for Bush than were registered in individual precincts. The vote count was fast and the mainstream news media in the United States accepted the results of these machines on election night, like bam, announcing the outcome of the election faster than Rachael Ray can cook a Thirty Minute Meal on the food network. Exit polls sort of disagreed with the results, but hey, exit polls appear to be taken more seriously in the Ukraine, and by Secretary of State Colin Powell, when applied to the Ukraine.

... here is the full article

2 Comments:

The more comfortable the people get the more they will allow their rights to slip away unnoticed. I'm still amazed at how quickly Kerry gave it up. Maybe he was paid off?
2/14/2005 11:11:00 pm  
I say we put Rachel Ray in charge next time around.... she get'em counted quickly and efficiently plus give the poll workers a liitle nosh when they get weary of young republicans with clipbaords looking over their shoulders, and shaking their heads in disgust every time a democrat's anem and address checked out on their little list. (At least that's what went on at my polling place in Michigan. They looked like critics watching an intern's first operation on the hospital channel.)
2/15/2005 03:41:00 am  

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